3/5 isn't bad?

So far I can completed the first three tasks on my to do list for this week, i've also paid my halls fees, and had a meeting with my tutor about my assessment problems. I just need to get on with my annotations... get them done! I'm happy, but I know I have so much more to do.

KEEP WORKING!

let the working begin.

Today I have got so much work to do..

If I dont get this documentation finished by 10 tonight i'll be working until it is finished! I'm not sure exactly how long it'll take but i'm motivated and I WILL FINISH MY WORK TODAY! :( Not happy that I was ill last week, that cut a good few days off of the time I had left before assessment.

So.. back to work!

1st Scan! :)

So this is the drawing i've been doing... I'm quite pleased so far, but it needs working no as you can see i'm no where near finished! :D But still.
Taken from this:

'To Do' list for this week.

Week - 26-30th

-> Take photos (good quality) for documentation.
-> Start typing up documentation.
-> Write up statement by 29th. (thursday)
-> Finish sticking in sketchbook photos.
-> ANNOTATIONS.

Oh also, buy birthday cards... so many birthdays coming up in May it is unreal, I can't wait for my birthday actually, well that's a lie, i'm really frightened by the idea of turning 20. I just like the idea that it'll be the summer holidays when my birthday comes around, and I can spend time with my family, and the guinea pigs, I must post a picture of them.

&& I'm buying myself an IPOD next weekend, seeing as i'm working all this weekend, stupid beer festivals! :( OH I did a drawing yesterday that i'm going to post once I figure out how to scan them in.. I am ashamed to say I am yet to learn how to use my scanner.

in a word...

DOMMIN. ♥♥♥

):

so today I was shopping in primark, when someone asked me whether I only wore my converse with leggins, or if I wore dolly shoes. So my reply was no I don't really like dolly shoes, after they said thanks, I start to walk off. Then they start to mock my outfit behind my back, laughing, pointing... DICKS.


It's people like that, that reduce my faith in people.

ouch.

Today i've been told i have tonsilitis.
Also, it is not cool that when a hot guy opens the door for you and you reply with a very monster sounding 'thanks.' SO cringeworthy! JOY.
But now i'm watching series two of 90210 in my duvet with bottles of ribena by my side so everything is good, well except that it hurts to bloody drink the stuff! :(

BTW: Liam from 90210 (aka Matt Lanter) = :D

so today...

i'm feeling much happier than yesterday.

Firstly, I received two lovely, motivating messages from my mum and bestie Amy, they made my evening. Secondly I saw a lot of very large people today, and after deciding to wear a skirt out, I am slightly more confident about the size I am. But that's not to say i'm not going to work on getting smaller, because that is the only aim I have for this year, well that and pass the year with a 60% at least.



I love this song currently.
Dommin are keeping me sane.
Just waiting on thier album to arrive at my door.

♥ 'i'm so afraid that you'll leave me cold, with my heart in your hands, closing your grip.'

i feel

f#cking ugly.
FAT.
& f#cking ugly! (Yes i'm aware I wrote this twice)

I've gained weight, and this has to stop.
I'm going to make some serious changes.

I can't live like this.
How can he like me this way? I must have gained two sizes in the 2 and whatever years that we've ben together. He's loosing it and i'm gaining it. I hate my body. I need to loose weight. I want to feel pretty! I want to feel sexy! And I want him to think i'm sexy, being me at the moment is hard. I'm loosing the will to appreciate what people feel for me, how can they like me when i'm doing this to myself? This is ridiculous! THIS HAS GOT TO STOP!

I think i'm loosing him.
I couldn't stand that for one second.
I want to be the perfect size 10 I was when we met.
Please make this feeling go away.
Help me loose weight, and have the will power to stop eating so much shit! I'll proove I can do it somehow!

Quick catch up.

Hello blog.
It's been a short while since i've been on here, but there isn't much to report really. I mean i'm back at uni now, so i'll be on my laptop alot as i've got a tonne of work to do, and print off. Luckily my new printer/scanner works a treat, so i can start scanning in my doodles and stuff.
But i just want to show off my purse that I bought in Camden.

= ♥
Anyway, currently i'm listening to Dommin. I do love a bit of Dommin in the afternoons :)

i'm currently...

watching the 1986 film:
Labyrinth.

David Bowie plays the king of the goblins.. who may I just say are UGLY! I'm not quite sure how I feel about this film, but so far, thumbs up! It's really quite funny. :)
My favourite character is his little caterpillar thing...


That is all.

Oh.
P.s, I'm currently reading 'Living Dead in Dallas' and listening to 'Greatest Love Songs Vol. 666' by HIM.

easter monday.

easter eggs.... NO!
Cupcakes are where it's at.