They really are the best at describing me, I know I say this a lot, but today as I walked onto campus I listened to Pink's album Funhouse - something I'll admit I've been listening to a hell of a lot! I can't help it, it is so true to my life right now, it's unreal. There are a few songs on that album that relate so well to my current situation, and I am so sure that listening to them is actually breaking my heart, because I'm starting to realise how hurt I'm going to be soon. Give it a month and things are going to change, and I don't think I want them to, not that I really have any control over the subject.
I wish you would see how I feel, and I wish you'd come and help me deal with it, after all you seem to be the reason my head and heart are acting this way. It is so unusual for me to feel this way, I've even turned to drinking to help numb it out - ask anyone, that is NOT something I usually do at all, I barely drink more than 2 drinks in a night, and last night... my god did I drink! The thing about it is, it made me feel better! Even though the intention was wrong, I think it helped, but now I feel like I did before the mass amounts of alcohol were consumed, so now I find myself finding any excuse to go out at night, just to get wasted again..
I promised myself I wouldn't feel this way.
Now look.
Thanks...
It's all your fault, you called me beautiful.
You turned me out, and now I can't turn back.
I hold my breath, because you were perfect,
but I'm running out of breath, and it's not fair.
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